I will be there....I still think...

It never wandered around,

I never thought a lot about,

It went and passed by,

U were there and are always,

“I will be there at that moment always,

I still think about that always…..”

You keeping up with all life wanted,

You there to stay for what I admired,

You always standing tall for what “WE” desired,

You there to hold me strong,

“I will be there at that moment always,

I still think about that always…..”

The small things you did,

The small things that made me live,

The false lies you made me regret,

The love you made me forget,

The life you gave me saying that,

“I will be there at that moment always,

I still think about that always….”

The reasons you gave me,

One I am still looking for,

The hurts unbearable as they still are,

One you remind me as much as it can,

I will search all, till you are there to say

“I will be there at that moment always,

I still think about that always….”

(PS: Still listening to the SRK poem in JAB TAK HAI JAAN)

For YOU!!!

Spent, Felt, Cried, Loved, and Lost,

You are the one whom I feel and believe, of them ALL!

Died, Deprived, Craved, Begged, and Gained,

You are the one  who is priceless, of them ALL!

Killed, Cheated, Revolted, Lied, and Boasted,

You are the one who got the simplicity, of them ALL!

Drugged, Dosed, Conked, and Swooned.

You are the best sight, of them ALL!

Discovered, Possessed, Caught, and Captured,

You are the best I have, of them ALL!!

SINGER OF THE SCREW-YOU LAND

Once upon a time, in a distant SCREW-YOU LAND,

Lived a singer, with his SCREW-YOU BAND.

He danced and roamed from street to street,

Shouting aloud, and calling it a melodic treat.

Everyone in the land, and some on his own bandstand,

Were aware, that his music was laid and bland!

No ears did he give to the townsmen,

Neither did he react to what his mates had to say,

He continued singing his songs, to everyone, whatsoever it may!

And then came one day,

When the town heard the SCREWER of the SCREW- YOU LAND proclaim:

“You make one more song, darn you, the SCREW-SINGER,

  You lose your tongue, darn you, the SCREW-SINGER!”

The SCREW-LANDERS did sympathize,

But underneath, they had a reason to rejoice,

They were hopeful that now, the singer had no other choice!

Long takes to prosper, and longer turns to reign,

The SCREW-SINGER had one last song to make,

All heard as he sang along,

Without a fear to lose his songs:

“Oh, you SCREWER, of the SCREW-YOU LAND,

  Do chop off my tongue, if you feel my music is so screwed up bland.

  Do remind me what remains for me,

  I know nothing, but the songs I sing,

  The songs, which are my only abbey!

  Oh, you SCREWER, of the SCREW-YOU LAND,

  Can a man live after losing his gland?”

Everyone heard, and everyone saw,

How the SCREWER stuck to his law!

A slash of the sword, and blood everywhere,

The singer lost his soul in the petite affair!

No one screamed, and none did shed any tears,

As the SCREW-SINGER’s shrills fainted, without any sears.

Death ends as much as it revives,

Nothing more can now be heard on SCREW-LAND,

More than the SCREW-SINGER's advice!

As all the younkers rise, and sing along,

“Tell me oh SCREWER of the SCREW-YOU LAND,

 Can a man live after losing his gland?”

PS:  Never deprive someone of the right to feel the soul inside!

    

I AM YOU!!

I walked through the storms, holding you in my hand,

For the love, I have, the pains never count,

You are me, and I am you,

Between us, there is no adieu!

I still remember the day:

Mid of the way; they taunted,

The taunts screamed in your ears more than they could,

They forced, and you stopped, and made me stop too.

You asked me to be ripped off, which made me aghast

Why, I asked, 

The why, which you never replied to,

Is still there and haunts me, whenever I feel you.

Dark as I was, and darker as they showed,

Blinded the vision you had, I suppose,

You tried to hide, get away from me,

But there were no reasons that I could foresee!

I was destined to be with you,

If not you, no need of me,

I came from you, I merged in you, I lived in you, and wanted to die with you.

Though dark, as they found me to be,

I am you, and you are me!

The sounds, the shrieks, the pain, and the pleads,

You gave in to all,

Tried to escape from me! 

 I am dark, that is how I should be,

Dark as death and death resides in me,

Hence, I took your plea,

And deprived you of what you should be!

Till then, I was fluxed in you,

Now, you are the one, who looks up to me,

Still, will carry you in my arms,

As, I am you and you are me!

(Got a little inspired from "Bhala Bura" song from the movie "Aks"! But it turned out to be a lot different from what I expected! If you read it, try to emote. For instance: an evil laugh after the line "Tried to escape from me!", and then continue with an arrogant voice.)

This is not one, but many!

2012 has seen me in great despair.

There was a lot I wanted to talk, but most of the times I lost the words which would have helped me to mouth my emotions. I suddenly started losing my way with the rhymes. Started finding it really difficult to write, or even to express.

Who has been stopping me, or rather what has been stopping me from doing what I love the most?

John Denver’s “Poems, prayers and promises”, no longer is playing in the background anymore!

Am I too done with this existence? Am I left with nothing to remember and be grateful of?

Are there no more sufferings which trouble me? Are there no pains which make me feel alive?

It is nothing of that sort happening with me!

I still feel happy to see all the lovely people around me. They still make me happy and provide the beautiful moments which bloom into an endlessly large flower as time fleets by. She still sits with me as she used to, talks to me as she used to do. We still fight like the school kids. Moments are still there but the vision has gone translucent towards them. Time has replaced the life in it. First I used to feel it, now I just pass by it!

Things still make me uncomfortable. They are always around, and need one chance to make me feel terrible about myself. But it is that, I have stopped feeling!

How can I write without feeling things?

I need to get back into my old shoes which made me sing a song with every moment passing by!

I am still there....

It wasn’t for me that destiny got untied,

The answers that it gave me once, were so untrue and out casted,

They were away from the reality and looked like some bunch of flowers which I wanted to hold.

They still are the same, the bunch which is placed far away and I waiting to hold.

If it was for me, it would have been that,

But it is not!

It is you, who made the figure out of some pebbled mud and broken mould,

This life belongs to all of you,

What I am is how you have seen me!

Because, my natural self is still that vague, irrational and erratic boy,

Who used to chase those seven colored flies!

The flies which were attracted towards the same bunch of flowers!

A few Questions for Dibakar Banerjee

This post comes out of faith and belief we always had in you.

Your latest creation, SHANGHAI, left us in a dilemma and I would like you to answer some of our questions about the movie:

1. Why the movie was named “SHANGHAI”?

2. What was the significance of letting the viewers know that Kalki’s father was a General who was caught in a scam of 40 crores?

3. How did we come to know that Emraan Hashmi was an outright pornographer (there were scenes where he was requesting girls to get into modeling and then in the second half a more clear version of him GETTING involved into pornography. But throughout he was clicking pictures and making videos of events; which was more of a freelance journalism rather than pornography.)? And, even if he was a pornographer, why is it being projected so loudly everywhere, except in the movie?

4. Why did Kalki leave New York (as mentioned by Prosonjeet somewhere)?

5. Why was the extramarital affair between Kalki and Prosenjit shown? How is it important to the script?

6. What was the meaning of the dialogue, “If the CM would have become PM, our country might have achieved the level of China”?

7. What were the significance of the below scenes:
• Kalki and Abhay slipping on the wet floor.
• Conversation between Emraan and Abhay in the washroom.

8. How did everyone come to know that Emraan’s brother had a tape, although he had told this only to Emraan and Kalki? And if they came to know about it, why didn’t they try to destroy the entire studio (they threw everything out of the studio except the CPU)?

9. Last: Where does SHANGHAI hit so hard that it becomes difficult for viewers like me to hear any noise it creates?

PS: We wouldn't have asked these, if SHANGHAI was supposed to be another Commercial flick. It isn't! It is something much more intelligent (as we understand from the critic's and a few viewer's reactions.


                                                                                                                                             Amit Mohan
                                                                                                                                             Rohit Sinha

REBECCA PART 4: SHAPING ME-2

REBECCA got created here: REBECCA

There were times I drew myself,

Tried to give a figure to my thin thoughts,

Everything was so detached,

I was unable to view my instance in mirrored lots!

Who was I and how did I appear?

Questions which struck me days apart!

Convinced with how you feel,

Left with how you see,

I had nothing of my own to be.

I was just your creation with no creativity in me!

Still with unopened eyes I lie,

As I free myself to die,

To die and renew!

Rebecca shapes herself with her ashes strewed!!!

Speaking To Conscience: Part 1

Q: What should I do to protect myself from the troublesome situation?

A:  Let things get to you as they are and see how they shape up. It was never simple and it is not so hard yet. It is just that you feel what you want to feel. Love what you are into and feel how it wants you to feel. 

     Don’t judge, don’t react. Just accept. Accept that the things are not how you want them to be and accept one more thing that things will someday be how you want them to be. 

     Give yourself some time. Talk to yourself as you are doing now and see your reflections around. Find people like you. Talk to them and share with them. Be a help and let them help you. 

     Breathe as slow as you can and sometimes as fast as no one can. Decide for yourself and not for the time. Rule yourself and not the situation. Reverberate with yourself and not with the dilemma you are in. Don’t fight! It won’t help. 

     Don’t be passive as it is the worst thing you could do to yourself. Don’t run away and don’t try to face. There is nothing to face. The only truth around is you and your existence. No one can take it away from you. 

     I know life could have been simpler. I know decisions could have been rational. But then I know one more thing that there is no enthusiasm and agility in something which is simple and known. 

     Love yourself as much as you can and love whatever you have done. Do not repent as you did not do anything wrong. You made some wrong moves, but then that is how we have to be to exist with divine. Take some wrong moves and end the vicious circle. 

    Merge with me and let yourself be free.  

NEWS 17/11/2011 from @VSAR's BLOG

This requires more research than my job does! But I do it for you, all you beautiful people who read what I write. 

So here are some stories which looked like headlines to me today.

1. “Dear God, let me do this for you.”

This is not at all a private letter to almighty but Oscar Ramiro Ortega-Hernandez’s feelings. The man   from Idaho was caught on Wednesday in Pennsylvania.

His crime?

He dared to shoot at the White House, last Friday night.

The police believe him to be a mental patient obsessed with God and his dictations to him. I don’t know where these people come from and how do they get such vibrations in brain.

The hearing on the White House shooting was today.

The best part of the entire episode; this was not the first time that White House has been shot. So it won’t feel anything new happening to it. The President and his wife were travelling, so stop thinking about their well being and read the next news. J

2. Keeping you updated with SOPA, don’t remember it?

SOPA, guys, the Stop Internet Piracy Act that was proposed by Eric Schmidt from Google Inc.  I mentioned it in the yesterday’s news. Anyways, if you don’t know, get yourself updated.

The latest news from SOPA’s kitty is that it is being opposed as a bill which can cause internet censorship. One more censor. I can’t tolerate it. Can you?

3. Bradley Cooper, remember him? Of! Course you do. The Hangover hunk? J

He is selected as 2011’s sexiest man alive. I hope Jack Black doesn’t get tempted by this and start trying to look handsome. :D

4. Even after ruining Nokia’s cell market and capturing the entire web, the hunger of Google doesn’t seem to stop. 

Here they are with the official launch of their Google Music. With this, they seem to overtake Apple’s itune.

Let us see google, how far can you make it?

5. Now, one from my desk; after starving a lot, I actually made others starve today. (This doesn’t make any sense, does it?)

Keep yourself updated : HERE

NEWS 16/11/2011 from @VSAR's BLOG

The day has been a little restless and unworthy for me as I spent most of the time doing nothing.

Let us see how it was for others… :)

1. Heather Locklear and Jack Wagner took their relationship one step back. They called off their engagement. Awesome!!! Wasn’t it? Sorry if it hurt your feelings but these silver screen babies have this habit of doing this more than often.

2. There is a new revolution in the online world. Don’t worry! No one takes away Google’s credit. Eric Schmidt, the Executive Chairman of Google has proposed a new law to the online world. It is called SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) and intends to screw all of us who love watching pirated movies, playing pirated games and listening to pirated music. So all you pirates, be aware or book yourself a separate cell.

3. Watch out for evil queen Julia Roberts in the forthcoming Hollywood attraction: Mirror Mirror. What do you want more? Go and catch up with the trailer on youtube or something.

4. For all the SUV lovers, here is Ford with its 2013 Ford Escape. The Los Angeles Auto show saw this beautiful baby. Wait for it and till then be relieved by some of its pictures on Google. ;)

5. Last but not the least, one from my desk. I will be sued by my readers someday for writing on so many varied topics. :D 

Keep looking for more updates here: NEWS @ @VSAR

REBECCA PART 3: SHAPING ME-1

REBECCA got created here: REBECCA

I rise to see the clouds unveiled,

The drops still wetting the locks.

Brightness once proposed to be dim, feels blinding,

The air whispers to the nakedness of my physical lot.

 Hard to feel the toughness of land,

The feet seem to be numb and bland.

Touch doesn’t work anymore,

The hands have lost their power to control.

Smells are unique,

They don’t seem to distinguish themselves as they flow,

My voice voices me,

It has my inner glow.

No more do I resemble the dead,

REBECCA shapes me and in me she dwells……

To be continued….

TAARAA & @VSAR: EPISODE 1

CLICK ON THE PIC TO ENLARGE.... 

REBECCA PART 2: NAMING MYSELF

Continued from: I AM BORN

You called me names,

And made them me,

You did it for yourself,

And engraved on me,

You tried to mould,

And make me resemble how you thought me to be.

I revoke you of your rights on me,

And name myself REBECCA,

REBECCA, which binds me to me.

To be continued….

REBECCA PART 1 : I AM BORN

I held the music you deprived me off,

I made the noise you stripped me off,

I touched the soul you ripped me off,

I saw the light you blinded me off.

& now you come back and enquire:

Where did I get the support you showed me not?

 The hands have power to create answers,

The will has knowledge to lay off pasts,

You shout, I speak not,

But my dreams have answers to shut you off!!!

To be continued…..

Some Lines.....

Some lines drawn on the sheet,

Some lines drawn in vain,

Some lines with shades of dark,

And some erased somewhere during the path.

Some lines reluctant to express,

Some with a start till end.

Some having the truths to unfold,

Some with secrets hidden deep below their mold.

And then too all have a certain story to tell,

And a smile to share,

And some tears to shed.

Some lines drawn on the sheet,

They rise, rise where all of them meet.

GREED (2/7)

Continued from: WRATH (1/7)

The desire when ends, ends you in and out and when it grows beyond the proximity of imagination, it demands for a transformation; a transformation from being good to being bad.

I had tried to acquire the greed to be successful than everyone around, to own more than anyone can ever; but it has never stretched in me for more than a day. The reason why I kill it before it can kill me, is the soul which I want to prevent. My soul is not acquired, it is my gift and it will be the last thing which will transmute. 

ONE FINE DAY, I HAD THIS CONVERSATION WITH THE GREED:

Greed: See all want to be happy and merry, but you should be happier than them.

Av: There will be still a lot who will be happier than me, where will all this end?

Greed: Come on! Boy, life is all about competition and stepping over each other.

Av: If I belong to the race, I will also be stepped over some day.

Greed: How about being the best, the chosen one among all?

Av: The chosen one was he who taught to stand together with all.

Greed: Don’t you want to prove something to this world?

Av: Will the world be happy if I prove something to it, or will it be greedy to prove things more than me?

Greed: So, you want to remain reckless through life; staying away from the competition makes a horse go wild.

Av: A wild horse rather than a tamed one, a wish that I wish for rather than a replicated one, and a soul as free as it was once, better way to live rather than the greedy one.

And he disappeared, with a smile on his face and eyes full of tears.

I knew that this is what he wants; he wants me to stay away from him.

& I Get Crossed Again

Was it a cry that they cared for, or was it just a lonely devil inside,

Was it a breath that they looked for, or was it just the smell of blood far aside?

The dwelling peace and the rained mud,

The whispers in the silence that all dreamt for,

Music in the breeze when the days were not so calm,

The gifts for who never belonged and a shoulder for them, who had no one to return,

The promises in short which I made, some fulfilled some still remain,

The heart achieved through constant concern,

The heart which feels for everyone,

The heart which made me crossed then,

Seems to have crossed me again.

I got holes in my body, to make them free from the pains,

And now when I reside in them,

I see them pierced every now and then.

Was it a fool’s decision that I made once again,

Am I made to suffer the hurting till the end?

I got crossed to reside in you, to see myself resurrected with you again,

To see my life in you begin,

But what happened before happened again,

A devil’s cry is taken care of again,

And now I get crossed,

I get crossed again.

 A petite attempt to summarize the pains,

 Of The ONE who got crossed,

 And is still getting crossed for us again and again........................

Random @ Avsar

1.    Q.    What was there in Rang De Basanti that was not in Delhi 6?
       A.    One talked about Bhagat Singh and it will always be relished if we involve something of past. And the second talked about PRESENT...and we are not ready to accept that we can ever be wrong at any point.

2.   Since the times of Jaliyawala Baag,  we have always believed on wrong numbers by government. That day it was 389...and day before yesterday, 13/07/2011, it was 21.

3.   You are like every other guy till you have a GIRLFRIEND.

4.   Girls are the most beautiful when they look at you with LOVE in their eyes, and you don't know that they are looking at you. They are angles whose love can never be seen in its true form.

5.  Things do not change with time.... They get wonderful!!!

6.  People bathe us after we are born, and they do the same after we die.

7.  I miss my friends a lot!

8.  How can we resist pain? Is it some kind of passion which makes us do that?

9.  A small noise can be as good as a loud one, if you have the right intentions behind it.

10. Friends and Family.

TWO TAKES

The molted metal and the burning water,

The rusted iron and the frozen air,

The blinded daylight and the deafened music,

The dryness of rainfall, and the greenery of autumn,

The emptiness of the occupied, and the rejection of getting accepted,

The twist in the straight and the best in that, which was bad,

The insane sanity and the lonely togetherness,

The wasted  applied, and the fertile with flavors of sterile,

The sad happiness and the plenteous lean.

The two takes of life and eternity.