Aug 10, 2007

scared!!!

Scared of something!!
don`t know wat....scared of failures...scared of losses....scared of drowning...

I took a long time to come to surface and i want to remain on the surface ... my oxygen is from the atmospheric air....not from the oxygen dissolved in the water..

Fuck...it`s really shitty when i think about my past....of no use....it takes a long to come out and it does.....

Every time u get the feeling...what if??

It`s scary....I don`t want to be part of any wrong!!!!

If it takes staying alone...away ... away from everyone...it is totally fine for me...but on the condition that the ones who are near me should remain happy!!!

Why so many complications??....I want to live a simple life.........some people who really care for me....and no one else...nothing else!!

I don`t want to be BIG.....the journey makes a devil out of a human!!!

Once i too called myself a KING!! One day i came to know.....the making of a king requires lots of sacrifices....no mum, no dad, no sisters, no lovers, no friends!!!!
The day i realized this i was out of the dreams!!!

One more incident which i remember now....i was trying to stop one of my friends not to take drugs and he was so badly in need of it....he started hitting me....i remember he had pushed me in a cover of barbed wires .. though i was like bleeding heavily...i continued stopping him...till he realized that he had hit me badly....and he broke off into tears and that day and today....the guy who woke up with cocaine hasn`t smoked even tobacco!

No meaning....just remembering one of shakespear`s sonnets!!


"
VV Hen I doe count the clock that tels the time,
And ſee the braue day ſunck in hidious night,
When I behold the violet paſt prime,
And ſable curls or ſiluer'd ore with white :
When lofty trees I ſee barren of leaues,
Which erſt from heat did canopie the herd
And Sommers greene all girded up in ſheaues
Borne on the beare with white and briſtly beard:
Then of thy beauty do I queſtion make
That thou among the waſtes of time muſt goe,
Since ſweets and beauties do them-ſelues forſake,
And die as faſt as they ſee others grow,
And nothing gainſt Times ſieth can make defence
Saue breed to braue him,when he takes thee hence."

the thing i got from the most beautiful sonnet in history of literature!!!

when i sum up the times and see the day persih in night
when i see everything getting old,
when i see trees without leaves,
when cause of heat the heard standing beneath the trees
and see the grains being carried away!!

then i think that this beauty is going to die one day!!
cause sweets and beauties go as time passes!!

no one can fight against time...and we are just left with the fact of begetting f childeren and children themselves!!



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